I need advice from Christian Weman. - Marriage and Family

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I need advice from Christian Weman.

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johnny
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Joined:	Mon Mar 19th, 2007
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Mana:

Posted: Mon Apr 23rd, 2007 05:51 am

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First of all let me say that my wife is a beautiful caring wife and mother. I don't consider any of my sexual addiciton to be her fault.

Before my wife and I married she had a sex drive that exceeded mine. After we married there was a noticable drop in her sex drive. now I would say that mine is greater than hers. We talked about it once and she said its not as fun anymore since "it isn't bad." Honestly at the time I could see her point. Frankly I was so wrapped up in sexual addiction to porn I really didn't care.

Now I am dealing with my sexual addiction and reaclamating myself to sex being between man and woman in a marriage relationship. This has caused a problem due to the afore mentioned lack of sex drive of my wife.

My feelings are hurt when my wife spurns my sexual advances. A feeling I honeslty haven't felt since college. For so long when my sexual advances were spurned by lovers I would just mastrubate. So now I am delaing with the whole rejeciton issue in a way I never had before.

Another thing is that I like to cuddle and be close. My wife has never really been that way. Sometimes when I want to touch her even in a non-sexual way she takes my affection for sexual advances.

I have confided in my wife about my sexaul addiciton to porn. She has been supportive but I don't really thinks she gets how hard this is. When we were first married she used to say all guys use porn and masturbate and I'm ok with that. I don't know if she was just trying to "be cool" or if using porn has really hurt her. I remember before we married my brothers wife caught him using porn and got upset. My wife to be acted like it was no big deal. Again I don't know if she was trying to appear hip or cool.

I geuus the long and the short of it is that praise God I have been able to control my sexual sin with more sucess than I have in the past. But now I am left to relearn how to be intimate with my partner. And at the same time wondering how to approach my wife about our sexual relationship.

Any suggestions are appreciated.

truthseeker
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Joined:	Tue May 16th, 2006
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Mana:

Posted: Mon Apr 23rd, 2007 11:51 am

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Hi Johnny,

There was some extensive discussion of this, or at least similar, in this thread. Hope it serves as at least a starting point.

http://www.blazinggrace.org/forums/view_topic.php?id=804&forum_id=8&highlight=wife+is+pregnant

TruthSeeker

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