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holdsworth
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 11:16 am |
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Last edited on Tue Jul 24th, 2007 10:45 am by holdsworth
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Billyeah
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| Joined: | Sat Aug 27th, 2005 |
| Location: | Alberta Canada |
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 03:29 pm |
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Well I think almost everyone here can relate to your pain. Some of us more than others but we all have been there or are there still. This site has been of great help to me, and I hope you can take the time to really dig into what this site has to offer. For me the biggest mistake I was making as I was going through the pain of falling back into porn, was I was trying to do it myself. I wanted to get out of porn because I was scared of people finding out, and of what I was doing to my wife. These may be good reasons but they should not be my main objectives. I was going about it all wrong. I should have wanted to stop looking at porn because that is what God wanted me to do. He doesn't want me to be looking at these awful images. The more I prayed and the more I let that sink in, the more I wanted to follow in Christ's footsteps. It has been easy so far and I have been porn free for quite a while now. But a big thing for me is to not underestimate satan. He isn't going to give up on you. He is simply waiting for you to let your guard down, and then he will come at you full force. But remember you have Christ on your side and there is nothing satan can do if you have Christ.
My steps to stay clean:
1 Pray and let Christ strenthen me
2:Know your triggers and avoid isolation.
3:Understand that Christ loves you. Satan will try to tell you otherwise.
4:Instead of trying to not do what is wrong, make a effort to do what is right. When you are trying to do what is right, you don't have time to do what is wrong.
Last edited on Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 03:30 pm by Billyeah
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matt
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| Joined: | Mon Oct 3rd, 2005 |
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Posted: Tue Nov 29th, 2005 07:33 pm |
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Oh man, as I was reading your story, many past feelings of anger and frustration welled up within me. I've shared you immense difficulty in wanting desperately to overcome this addiction, but not understanding how. Recovery has not come easily at all for me, but I will say that the time I've put in has been well worth it. Many people on this site have loads of experience and great advice, so stay connected here and ask all of your questions. I don't have as much experience as most here, but would be happy to help in any way that I can, so feel free to contact me for any reason. Stay Strong! Stay Focused!
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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holdsworth
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Posted: Sun Dec 4th, 2005 08:18 pm |
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Last edited on Tue Jul 24th, 2007 10:45 am by holdsworth
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matt
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Posted: Mon Dec 5th, 2005 11:14 am |
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| Anytime man. Its been highly difficult for me to incorporate honesty and transparency into my life, but I find that the more I do, the lighter the load that I'm carrying becomes.
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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Billyeah
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Posted: Mon Dec 5th, 2005 01:48 pm |
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| I come from a culture where there is sooo much stuff that is swept under a rug and hidden. People are not all who they seem to be. You can't tell if they want to be your friend or if they want to find out more about you so they can go tell someone else. So coming here where there is no judgment from anyone, but actual genuine concern and love, is a great encouragement. This is what a Christian site, and Christian people are supposed to be like. Last edited on Mon Dec 5th, 2005 01:56 pm by Billyeah
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matt
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Posted: Mon Dec 5th, 2005 01:53 pm |
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Great thoughts Bill.
I come from the exact same background. Even though I was drinking every day from the time I got home from work until I passed out (and more on the weekends) both of my parents never admitted that I had a problem with alcohol. I tried discussing mx with my father once and got quickly rebuffed. So, I feel your pain. And I meant pain very literally. Its very painful to not be able to approach those closest to you with the most difficult things in your life.
This site really is a blessing to me.
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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holdsworth
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Posted: Tue Dec 6th, 2005 10:18 am |
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Last edited on Tue Jul 24th, 2007 10:46 am by holdsworth
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isolated
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Posted: Tue Dec 6th, 2005 01:48 pm |
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hey holdsworth, first I want to say your in my prayers right now, hey brother we have all fallen, but you know what. a rightious man falleth seven times, but yet shall he arise ! the bible says , and thats what I hear, in your words your more than a conqueror in my book Ro 8.37 and you what I praise God for brothers like you ,keep busy put on the full armour of God and stand! God Bless 
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matt
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Posted: Tue Dec 6th, 2005 03:57 pm |
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holdsworth,
my guess is that you're story and feelings are very much in line with the norm in men who struggle with this. I know what you shared is right in line with my story. I was extremely touched and moved by your courageous admissions and honest sharing of feelings. Don't despair, you're on the right path.
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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captivated
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Posted: Wed Dec 7th, 2005 04:01 am |
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Again, you guys and your realness and desire to fight for your own hearts.......to have something to offer to God and to others, touches my heart. Yes, you truly ARE more than conquerors through Christ!!!  Prayer and blessings in Jesus over you all!
captivated
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isolated
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Posted: Wed Dec 7th, 2005 07:59 pm |
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you all are very important to me in my life, and I want to thank you all! all the prayers ,all the good words, God Bless you all 
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matt
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Posted: Wed Dec 14th, 2005 01:00 pm |
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One main issue that my wife and I have had over our 5+ years of marriage is her desire for me to open up to her. She's very hurt that I don't feel comfortable sharing everything about myself with her. I've chosen very carefully in the past, which section of my life that I would share with which person in my life. I used to be internally proud of the fact that no one person knew everything about me. My gf knew about church related stuff and making out that she was involved in, my drinking buddies knew that I drank, friends who I knew had sex knew that I was involved sexually, but not one person was close enough to me to see over the walls that I had built in between each of my relationships. Not until very recently did I begin to knock down those walls and allow the closest people in my life to see the nasty, dirty rooms in other parts of my life. Not only did they not know what was in these other rooms, they didn't even know these other rooms existed. What a shock to them that must have been.
It has been greatly invigorating to me not to have to pull strings and always be on guard convincing people in my life that there were no other rooms, and that they really saw all of me. I can finally relax in no longer keeping up the charade.
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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