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sam
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| Joined: | Mon Oct 22nd, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 237 |
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Posted: Tue Nov 27th, 2007 03:49 pm |
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i have been doing pretty good lately. we have taken steps to limit exposure to stuff that i am tempted with. i am also happy to report that i have been able to avoid fantasy land during love making the last few times. i was tempted, but thank god, i was able to push it out of my mind. however, i am still struggling with the desire to have sex all the time. i am committed to spending more time in the word and praying than i had been and it has helped so much.
while reading hosea, it dawned on me that i am just like gomer, the prostitute god told hosea to take as his wife. she would be with her husband and before you knew it, she strayed away... how many times i can think of when i was passionate about god and doing his will then next thing i knew, i strayed away from him. i prostituted myself with greed, lust, love of self and on and on. if only i would get to the point where i lived out what i believe all the time and walked in the realization that nothing, absolutely nothing compares to being in a right relationship with my father.
bless you all. 
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sam
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| Joined: | Mon Oct 22nd, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 237 |
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Posted: Thu Nov 29th, 2007 02:28 pm |
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| extremely tempted right now. i don't really know why. just a typical day, none of the stuff that usually sets me off has happened. i'm determined not to do anything though. could it be that since i'm in my 30's my clock is ticking away and i just have a huge sexual appetite as a result? anyway, i don't care the reason... i've got to focus on my father who loves me.
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sam
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| Joined: | Mon Oct 22nd, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 237 |
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Posted: Thu Nov 29th, 2007 05:45 pm |
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| i'm better now. i don't know what gets into me. i hate this addiction. what makes it so much harder is that when i am going through a weak time, all i can think of is the need to act out, the end result - temporary flesh satisfaction... it's hard to see that what i am doing is more than a harmless desire and that my actions are not how god wants me to behave. i am so thankful that god is so patient with me. he loves me and treats me like i'm his only child.
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sam
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| Joined: | Mon Oct 22nd, 2007 |
| Location: | USA |
| Posts: | 237 |
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Posted: Fri Nov 30th, 2007 08:58 pm |
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today has been a good day. i am learning to take it moment by moment though. there are times when i get confident that i will be strong and resist temptation then out of nowhere, an impure thought pops into my head. my biggest problem lately has been within my mind, not actually looking at porn. just a constant desire...
i take comfort in what god says in his word, that he will NEVER leave me nor forsake me. i thank god for all he is doing in my life. maybe one day soon, i will be free.
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