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BrokenDiva
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Posted: Sat Jun 24th, 2006 02:50 am |
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The sun is shining today and one of my favorite things is driving through the city on a beautiful day....music is such an escape and here I am a woman with children I adore ..I am healthy and I have agood life....I have a partner who has been in recovery for 2 yrs and seems to be commited to his recovery and adore me.....so why are tears streaming down my face....as I listen to a love song..?? because no matter how wonderful everything is I still grieve the loss of who I though he was ..who I so desperatly wanted him to be...the man I was so sure I had....yes I chose to stay with him because I love him.....but will this ache ever really go away...?? well the sun is still shining and its a beautiful day............
Broken Diva
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Tears4Us
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Posted: Sat Jul 1st, 2006 07:11 am |
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I so understand what you are saying. I think grieving is part of the healing process. I pray that the Son is always shinning on you......
Sometimes life seems hard to bear,
Full of sorrow, trouble and woe
It's then I have to remember
That it's in the valleys I grow.
If I always stayed on the mountain top
And never experienced pain,
I would never appreciate God's love
And would be living in vain.
I have so much to learn
And my growth is very slow,
Sometimes I need the mountain tops,
But it's in the valleys I grow.
I do not always understand
Why things happen as they do,
But I am very sure of one thing.
My Lord will see me through.
My little valleys are nothing
When I picture Christ on the cross
He went through the valley of death;
His victory was Satan's loss.
Forgive me Lord, for complaining
When I'm feeling so very low.
Just give me a gentle reminder
That it's in the valleys I grow.
Continue to strengthen me, Lord
And use my life each day
To share your love with others
And help them find their way.
Thank you for valleys, Lord
For this one thing I know
The mountain tops are glorious
But it's in the valleys I grow!
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24hours
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Posted: Mon Jul 3rd, 2006 05:47 pm |
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I am on the other side of the coin. I know I have wronged my wife. I have been an addict for years and it all came down when I kissed my wifes best friend almost two years ago. I know she must be hurting deeply. I have been in recovery for over a year and a half and I have been sober for over a year. I dont know if there is anything I can do to help her. We recently separated and I am hoping that things work out for us to get back togeather. I cant understand her pain, and I wish I could. I ask for God to show me and over time I hope he will.
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Elizabeth
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Posted: Wed Jul 12th, 2006 05:21 pm |
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Grief is like that. After a storm, some aftermath is still left. Even when things get rebuilt, grief can remain for awhile, but like grief of all types, time heals and it will get better.
"...weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.." Psalm 30:5
____________________
Elizabeth
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BrokenDiva
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Posted: Wed Jul 12th, 2006 11:25 pm |
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thanks for your words Elisabeth, my therapist once told me no one just gets over this...you learn to live with it, you begin to slowly incorporate it into your reality and try to accept it. I have to say I struggle more most days with what the behaviour was and the things he did , over all the disappointment of finding out he ( my partner) was not the man I though he was in fact he was not much of a man at all and this will be my struggle for some time. That and trying to believe anyone really changes more than just stopping the acting out behaviour. I struggle with his insistance that as he heals his issues and pain from the past ,that he feels less and less the pull of addiction if at all...........?? where is my magic ball when I need it to see the future ....read minds LOL not gonna happen 
Broken Diva
mom of 5 wonderful children ....all the diamonds I will ever need .
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