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24hours
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Posted: Wed Jun 21st, 2006 05:53 pm |
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I am looking for some guys who have been or are currently separated from their wives. I have been in Recovery for 1 year and a half and have been sober for over a year. I recently separated from my wife and I am looking for support in this time. Post a reply and hopefully we can all work thru our experiences togeather.
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24hours
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Posted: Sun Jul 2nd, 2006 12:50 am |
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| Am I the only one fighting? I am so hurt right now. I dont know what is going to happen next. I have been out of my home for three weeks and I am feeling so wounded. I try to let God help me in my pain and it works, but it comes right back. I miss my wife and I want my marriage to come back to life. I want to honor my wife and her boundries. I just dont know how to make it sometimes. What should I do? I am sober, I am praying reading, going to counselling. I am doing everything, but I am so fearful. I know its about trusting God, but that is so difficult for me too. I hope you guys and gals can speak to me in this, and give me something, anything.......
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Tears4Us
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Posted: Sun Jul 2nd, 2006 12:55 am |
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| Hi, I am not a guy, so all I can offer are prayers for you....
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24hours
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Posted: Mon Jul 3rd, 2006 05:08 pm |
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Thanks, I wish I could look at it better from her side. I know she must be hurting and that this must be difficult for her. I just dont understand why it has to be so hard. I feel so rejected and unaccepted. I cant even sit with her at church. I try to just survive 24hours at a time. It is not easy, but I try. I want to act out so badly because I hurt so much, but I know it would only serve to kill my marriage, or whats left of it. I cant understand all the damage I have done, or the severe pain my wife has gone thru. I hope than in this time the veil will be pulled away and I can clearly see.
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Tears4Us
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Posted: Mon Jul 3rd, 2006 05:51 pm |
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I am so sorry your marriage is going through this. I can tell you from a wife's point of view it hurts and hurts deeply. I know in the early stages of my husbands acting out, I felt cheated on, betrayed and hopeless. I still do sometimes.
Father God, I pray for this couple. I pray that strength be given to each that the bondage can be broken in Jesus name and that they reunite and have a Christ filled marriage. I pray Father that you bring healing and comfort to this wife as she is hurting, You know I know this pain and I ask Father that you do the same for her as you did for me.
Father, I ask that today be a new day for this couple and that the sin that has this marriage bound be made clear and that by that clarity measures will be taken to start the healing process for both. I ask Father that you hold one and catch the other, because we know you hand is not shortened.
Father today I want to thank you for the many works you have done, the ones we see and the ones we don't. I want to thank you for this husband who has come forth and is seeking help, even if he does not quite understand why yet. thank you for you blessings as we seek to be more like you....In Jesus name
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dfs
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Posted: Mon Jul 3rd, 2006 08:31 pm |
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| In Jesus name Father I agree to this prayer...
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24hours
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Posted: Mon Jul 3rd, 2006 08:42 pm |
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| Thanks everyone. It is wonderful to feel supported. Today I got a list of parameters from friends of ours. We have close friends and a counselor helping us through this process. I feel more secure in knowing what is happening now. I see a light in this process, I just hope my wife wants this to work as much as I do.
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24hours
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Posted: Fri Jul 28th, 2006 10:56 pm |
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| Well, the boundries are so difficult. I feel like I want to move towards my wife when she opens up to me, but I know I shouldnt be. I keep breaking the boundries we setup and I know it is just causing my wife to trust me less and less. I have committed to follow them for a week solid to my counsellor. I know she needs to see leadership in this. I have failed in that aspect. I want so badly to begin putting trust back into our relationship and to grow in intimacy over time with my wife. I know it will take a long time, it hurts alot and all I can do is the steps and to follow the boundries. I love my wife so much. I miss her so badly. You guys out there get it in gear and do the right thing. The penalty for not doing so, is so much greater than you will ever know.
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24hours
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Posted: Wed Aug 9th, 2006 08:00 pm |
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| Hey everyone, I hope you all will be praying. My wife will be meeting with my counselor tomorrow. They haven't met and I am apprehensive of how it will go. I hope they will put a plan together so that we may began to work on our marriage. I have been out of the house two months and I feel we are no closer to working anything out. My wife has a wonderful heart and I believe she wants us to get back togeather. She just doesn't believe we will. She feels as though she needs to prepare for the worst and hope for the best. She is moving towards a legal separation. She believes our financial woes are causing fear to close her heart to me. I am willing to take all the financial responsibility and in turn hope to open her heart back up. I want so badly to reconcile with her. I am working diligently on me. I know I keep making mistakes and my heart is not there yet, but I am doing everything I know how. Please keep us in your prayers.
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24hours
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Posted: Wed Aug 16th, 2006 05:54 pm |
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Well, though I am truely saddened, I am beginning to understand. My wife has asked me to legally separate from her. She met with my counselor and he recommended it as well. I am so sad that I did this to her, and I gave her the reason to feel so unsafe. I began this week to read the Townsend book boundries. I had skimmed it before and felt it was so wrong and heartless. As I am rereading it now, it has completely changed my outlook on everything. My wife has learned to have solid boundries, healthy boundries. I need to respect them and learn to understand that, it is right for her. I must learn to put solid boundries into my life and learn to be ok with taking care of me. I am beginning to see everything in such a different light, and that being said I am feeling more safe in my own skin. Please keep me in your prayers and pray for my wifes heart as well. Thank you all
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Bulldawg
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Posted: Thu Aug 24th, 2006 05:35 pm |
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Keep fighting. Take the steps to become the kind of man God wants you to be-remember He's got a plan and purpose for you. Hollar at me anytime.
Rick
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We will all feel very much ashamed if we do not yield to Jesus the areas of our lives He has asked us to yield to Him. To reach that level of determination is a matter of the will, not of debate or of reasoning. It is absolute surrender of your will.
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