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P2J
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Posted: Sun Mar 11th, 2007 09:13 pm |
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Most of the BG recovery website is about recovery from sex addiction and its many facits (obviously). It occurred to me that there's not much said about hope for the future unless it's implied.
Scripture states that "Where there is no vision the people perish". Personally I can't imagine what life would be like without my addiction or without recovering from my addiction.
Sin has robbed me of any hope for a future. Real life in the real world involves the pursuit of prosperity in relationships, finances, vocational and professional achievements etc but I find that these things are no longer on my agenda.
Once, my energy was shared between the pursuit of prosperity and the pursuit of my sin. I now find that prosperity is gone and even more time and energy has to be put into abstaining from sin.
My prayers (whether merely thought or mumbled audibly in private) extend to a daily manna/rescue thing. So I'm wondering how others in the process of recovery see (more explicitly) their future? Mine looks so very blank_______
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TimM
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Posted: Mon Mar 12th, 2007 07:46 pm |
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Right now I'm pretty busy, but I found a document I wrote for my sponsor about a year ago about the blessings and hopes I had in recovery at that time. Here it is, just to kick off the thread:
Reasons for Recovery / Blessings of Recovery
1. I have a place in church.
2. My daughter laughs when I tease her.
3. I'm not hiding all the time.
4. For the first time in my life, I have been really aware of God's presence and guidance.
5. My wife feels like I'm paying attention to her.
6. I am making friends in recovery.
7. I'm at peace with God.
8. I'm at peace with my family.
9. I'm starting to understand myself.
10. I'm not afraid.
11. I'm learning to listen, like to the girls with their guinea pig (which was sick and which we took to the vet instead of my ignoring it as unimportant).
12. I'm understanding how painful my raging has been, and I'm mostly not raging.
13. I've had time to enjoy the kids' theatrical work.
14. From my own suffering and recovery has grown empathy with my students.
15. I'm not thinking of suicide.
16. I feel real joy.
17. I'm a lot calmer.
18. I am becoming able to see myself honestly, and therefore to see the world honestly.
19. I'm feeling something.
20. I'm not so alone.
21. My dreams are more peaceful.
22. We are more peaceful as a family.
23. I have hopes of leading my kids to a different course than mine.
24. I can imagine a future for myself and for my wife and the kids that is better than the present.
25. My wife and I are getting to know one another.
26. There is a chance to atone for some of the wrong I have done.
27. My kids have a father who cares about them.
28. I'm learning not to act out and drown in shame.
29. I have more time.
That's a short list and not a very deep one, but it's part of why I continue in recovery.
Tim M.
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P2J
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Posted: Mon Mar 12th, 2007 08:30 pm |
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Thanks TimM,
I should do likewise and honestly compile a list and maybe overlay it on my desktop. I appreciate your input.
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guitarist63
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Posted: Mon Mar 12th, 2007 11:28 pm |
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Thanks for starting this topic P2J. Counting your blessings is something God reminded me of last week - and if we all do as Tim's post suggests - list all the positive things that have come out of recovery from addiction then it will help us tremendously in seeing the vision for the future which God has for our lives. I have a vision but it's too long to describe here today and I have said that I'm taking a month away from BG to get sorted out. I am not free of the "m" habit yet and feel I should not be giving encouragement or advice to others until I have succeeded in giving it up. I'll continue praying for you regularly, if you'd like me to. Stephen.
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P2J
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Posted: Tue Mar 13th, 2007 01:02 am |
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Thanks guitarist63,
All prayers are gratefully received. I regret that you'll be absent for a while, your posts are always an encouragement and I note that you do a lot of praying (interceding) for people which has got to be good. Like you, I'm not over it (M) yet but am enjoying the honeymoon period of sobriety even though I still suffer a bit with withdrawl symptoms; Bil Moony-McCoy describes it as a "pink cloud".
I'm being convicted of the need to make a real connection with God through His Son Jesus. I have been trying to rely on my initial experience with Him some 30 years ago but "it just don't cut the mustard" any more.
I'm also being convicted to find a church (see Tim's point 1) containing some men who have come out of hiding who might act as accountability partners. That's what I understand by connecting with "the Christ", His body. Just attending church is so pathetically superficial, in fact I've even done so at times just to check out the talent.
Btw, I find Philip Yancy's book "Prayer" takes the etherial stuff and brings it right back down to earth; which brings me back to the topic - Vision. My vision for the future has always been about my own natural appetites. I'm beginning to think God has something else in mind.
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guitarist63
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Posted: Tue Mar 13th, 2007 01:21 am |
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Hey P2J, thanks for your kind words and encouragement. I appreciate this thread which I think will be beneficial to the forum. Accentuating the positive is bound to be good for all of us. Truthseeker has replied to one of my posts that mentions my intention to be away for a month and persuades me to stay. Blessings, Guitarist63
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guitarist63
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Posted: Wed Mar 14th, 2007 01:34 am |
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Hi P2J, your last post confirms what I had been praying for you, "I'm being convicted of the need to make a real connection with God through His Son Jesus." I also pray you'll find the right church with men who can share your own experience and struggles. I'll try an get hold of a copy of the book you recommend by Philip Young, on Prayer. Thanks very much. Blessings. Praying for you early this morning! Stephen
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P2J
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Posted: Wed Mar 14th, 2007 03:05 am |
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Thanks guitarist63,
It shouldn't be too hard to find as it's fairly popular, oh and its Yancy not Young.
Do appreciate your prayers. It's sobriety day one of 39 today. Lust is screaming at me from every corner, possibly because the number 40 is quite significant in the spiritual realm.
Was thinking/praying last night w.r.t. your 13 Mar post and also reading 1 Cor 5 where someone had become involved with his fathers wife. That got me reminiscing over the types of fantasies that have plagued me and it seems that most have a theme like adultery, fornication or even aspects of perversion. Those themes are so very different from the theme the Holy Spirit had in mind in 1 Cor 7:6-9 where Paul advises that it is better to marry than burn with lust. But I'm getting way off topic.
Happy day
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guitarist63
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Posted: Fri Mar 16th, 2007 12:19 am |
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Hey P2J, thanks for your correction - Yancy not Young. Strange I should get that wrong. Still offering prayers for you. I Thought of Romans 5, v.1-5 (New American Standard version) which I think would be of relevance to your present battle: "Therefore having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ (v.2) through whom also we have obtained our introduction by faith into his grace in which we stand; and we exult in hope of the glory of God. (v.3) And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; (v.4) and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; (v.5) and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us."
I hope these verses are an encouragement. Always, I find there's no substitute for the Word of God inspired by the Holy Spirit to speak into our personal lives and connect with us. Stephen.
Last edited on Fri Mar 16th, 2007 12:21 am by guitarist63
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guitarist63
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Posted: Mon Mar 19th, 2007 10:29 pm |
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P2J, thanks a million for the recommendation of Philip Yancey's book, Prayer, does it make any difference? (Hodder & Stoughton, 2006). It's beautifully written and packed full of invaluable advice and accounts by various people on the subject. I am on page 53. A lot of insights and a lot to digest. I continue to pray for you and let me know if there is anything specific. Blessings, Stephen
Last edited on Mon Mar 19th, 2007 10:31 pm by guitarist63
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forthelord33
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Posted: Mon Mar 19th, 2007 11:19 pm |
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Just wanted you to know that your list is very validating for me to read. I'm about 5 months into recovery and have a very similar list that has been blossoming. Praise the Lord for the fruits of righteous living.
Cheers,
Marc
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P2J
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Posted: Tue Mar 20th, 2007 12:34 am |
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Stumbled upon this the other day. It brought back some memories and is pertinent to this thread. When sung by a tennor it really is inspiring.
http://www.cyberhymnal.org/htm/c/o/n/confages.htm
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