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BlessedGanny
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| Joined: | Mon May 7th, 2007 |
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Posted: Wed May 9th, 2007 04:29 pm |
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My husband and I just got back together after being separated for 4 months because of his PA. He is attending counseling and a 12 step program and I can see some changes in him but, I have some concerns that I am hoping someone here can help me with. I feel like I am living with a stranger and I can't stand the thought of a stranger touching me. When my husband hugs or kisses me I can't wait for it to be over and I have a hard time looking him in the eye. I don't want to have any physical contact with him and it bothers me that I feel this way. Will this ever change?
Another thing that bothers me is he will watch something on TV (Soprano's) that has strippers or some kind of nudity in it and I will say "should you be watching this" and he will roll his eyes or tell me this stuff never bothered him. I feel that he shouldn't be watching this stuff at all but, I'm wondering if it is true. Can he watch this kind of stuff on TV and not want to go back to the porn on the internet. Sometimes I think I may be going over board but I'm not sure what I should expect.
I would really like to hear from those of you who have been through this.
BlessedGanny
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truthseeker
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| Joined: | Tue May 16th, 2006 |
| Location: | New Jersey USA |
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Posted: Wed May 9th, 2007 05:16 pm |
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Hi BlessedGanny,
Is your husband also a believer? If so, he should understand the principal often repeated on this site, that it is not how close you can get to the line of sin without crossing it, but how close you can get to God, which draws you a significant distance from the sin. If he is not, it should still matter to him that it concerns/hurts you. Do you have any counselling together? You could raise this issue.
He is a stranger. If he is truly recovering from his addiction, especially if it has been present for a long time, possibly all the time you have known him, you are getting to know the new/real him for the first time. This is certainly going to take some time. It is different for each person.
On a side note, a police officer who was giving a presentation on gang awareness to our PTA recently observed that it is a tragedy that a show which glamorizes one of the most dangerous and incidious problems among our youth and crime rate is among the highest rated shows.
Praying for you...
TruthSeeker
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BlessedGanny
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Posted: Wed May 9th, 2007 05:30 pm |
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| My husband is a believer who chooses not to live as one and yes his addiction goes back years. We both are in counseling but not together I have been wondering if we should be. This is my 4th day being back home and I am really stuggling I feel like I want to walk away from the marriage. I don't want to deal with it today.
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truthseeker
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| Joined: | Tue May 16th, 2006 |
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Posted: Wed May 9th, 2007 06:30 pm |
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Hi BlessedGanny,
Sending hugs. Hang in there, at least long enough to observe for genuine change. Is his counsellor a believer? Seeing one together might be a good idea, but only a believer is going to truly understand all that needs to take place.
I am praying for wisdom/discernment for you, and that his spirit will be broken, that he will have a broken and contrite heart, surrendering completely to the Lord, to live for Him alone. Psalms 51:17.
TruthSeeker
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