I'm back guys. I need your help.
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Mark37
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 Posted: Mon Mar 26th, 2007 11:43 pm
P2J wrote: Hi Mark37,

I'm just not sure what you mean by the words:

"I would release my built up sexual tensions in this fashion."

Are you saying that you merely verbally expressed gratitude to God for the innocence of your sexuality or are you saying that you practiced M while entertaining notions of innocence and gratitude?

What I am saying is that in order to bring my sexual innocence back to where it should be I would come before God, thank him for all my senses he gave me and then bring my sexuality before him and masturbate while thanking him for it without entertaining any lustful thoughts or mental images. This worked wonders for me after spending so much time doing it to porn. People may think its strange, but for me it worked. When you are single it is near impossible at least in my case to hold it all in and expect to stay clean. Look at all the members who post here and fail time and time again. Sorry but the excess flow that supposedly drains off when you urinate didn't cut it with me. After so much access to porn, prostitutes or whatever your problem is your view of sex is wharped. You can tend to fear sexual arousal. Its like oh, oh, here we go again! I've experienced many guilt free orasms in this fashion. Then when it came time for my wife after marriage I went into it with a clean view of sexuality. Also i needed to get over a pre-mature ejaculation problem which necessitated doing the same thing until I could hold it back long enough. It worked like a charm and I have had intercours with my wife lasting 20-30 minutes with no problem. Sorry, but I am not from the Victorian era of chastity belts and Jehovah witness style reprimands.

Mark37
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 Posted: Tue Mar 27th, 2007 12:12 am
This was one tough weekend! Friday night I had a dream where I was watching 2 lesbians get each other off and then they asked me to join in. After waking up Saturday that dream was still vivid in my mind and it took me awhile to get over it. Saturday I went to the Mexican restaurant where the pretty mexican girl works as a waitress. Things were going pretty good and I was diverting my eyes 60 % of the time well only 50% oh well! It went better than I thought it would. However, come bill time as  I went up tp pay it she was standing in front of me smiling a really sweet and sexy smile! All bets were off! I thought alot about her for several hours after I got home. Maybe if I looked 10 years  older than younger these problems would begin to go away. Sunday at the vitamin checkout there was a very nice woman standing there who I had talked to in the past. She is very pretty and I fantasized about her alot too and nearly fell at home with the porn but the main thing is that I didn't. I praised God for the temptations that they had no power over me and that through His strength I could overcome and I did.

As far as the masturbation post. Many, but not all men have some type of physical or mental hangup or sexual dysfunction and porn is a safe way of not having to face a real woman. Do you think that when an appealing woman comes along this is all just going to magically in the Lord just go away? It most certainly won't in most cases. By practicing guilt free masturbation I was able to come to grips with my sexuality and feel confident about it. If you don't feel confident about yourself and guilt free wait until the real deal is laying in front of you. Will you all of a sudden feel good about yourself? Probably not and then you will feel even less confident about it and could spiral into a vicious circle of sexual dysfunction that will take alot more than praying to the Lord about it to get over it.

guitarist63
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 Posted: Tue Mar 27th, 2007 12:20 am
It's a point of view Mark, so long as you recognize that it's your view and that you shouldn't impose it on others.  I don't impose my view on others - at least not intentionally.  Stephen.

Mark37
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 Posted: Tue Mar 27th, 2007 12:27 am
guitarist63 wrote: It's a point of view Mark, so long as you recognize that it's your view and that you shouldn't impose it on others.  I don't impose my view on others - at least not intentionally.  Stephen.

No imposing. Just in my view what works.

guitarist63
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 Posted: Tue Mar 27th, 2007 12:32 am
Thanks for your reassurance, Mark.  If you're still here (and I'm still here) in a year perhaps you can ask me if I have managed to follow the way I have chosen. I'd be interested to see how you get on as well. Stephen.

Last edited on Tue Mar 27th, 2007 12:33 am by guitarist63

junkyardboy
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 Posted: Sat Mar 31st, 2007 07:19 am
mark37 wrote:
"What I am saying is that in order to bring my sexual innocence back to where it should be I would come before God, thank him for all my senses he gave me and then bring my sexuality before him and masturbate while thanking him for it without entertaining any lustful thoughts or mental images. This worked wonders for me after spending so much time doing it to porn. People may think its strange, but for me it worked. When you are single it is near impossible at least in my case to hold it all in and expect to stay clean. Look at all the members who post here and fail time and time again. Sorry but the excess flow that supposedly drains off when you urinate didn't cut it with me. After so much access to porn, prostitutes or whatever your problem is your view of sex is wharped. You can tend to fear sexual arousal. Its like oh, oh, here we go again! I've experienced many guilt free orasms in this fashion. Then when it came time for my wife after marriage I went into it with a clean view of sexuality. Also i needed to get over a pre-mature ejaculation problem which necessitated doing the same thing until I could hold it back long enough. It worked like a charm and I have had intercours with my wife lasting 20-30 minutes with no problem. Sorry, but I am not from the Victorian era of chastity belts and Jehovah witness style reprimands."


well that certainly is a novel approach.
could you provide some scripture to help me understand this?
thanks,
peter



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Mark37
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 Posted: Sun Apr 1st, 2007 07:58 pm
junkyardboy wrote: mark37 wrote:
"What I am saying is that in order to bring my sexual innocence back to where it should be I would come before God, thank him for all my senses he gave me and then bring my sexuality before him and masturbate while thanking him for it without entertaining any lustful thoughts or mental images. This worked wonders for me after spending so much time doing it to porn. People may think its strange, but for me it worked. When you are single it is near impossible at least in my case to hold it all in and expect to stay clean. Look at all the members who post here and fail time and time again. Sorry but the excess flow that supposedly drains off when you urinate didn't cut it with me. After so much access to porn, prostitutes or whatever your problem is your view of sex is wharped. You can tend to fear sexual arousal. Its like oh, oh, here we go again! I've experienced many guilt free orasms in this fashion. Then when it came time for my wife after marriage I went into it with a clean view of sexuality. Also i needed to get over a pre-mature ejaculation problem which necessitated doing the same thing until I could hold it back long enough. It worked like a charm and I have had intercours with my wife lasting 20-30 minutes with no problem. Sorry, but I am not from the Victorian era of chastity belts and Jehovah witness style reprimands."


well that certainly is a novel approach.
could you provide some scripture to help me understand this?
thanks,
peter


Exact Scripture is something I would not be able to provide you with. It is a method to reprogram the mind. With me and I will say it again, other than petting with a few women in my teenage years and early twenties my sexual experiences were limited to porn, blow jobs from prostitutes and etc. I think somewhere in my childhood I learned that sex outside of mariage is wrong (parents) which it is but my sub-conscience mind took it a little to far. There was an occasion in my twenties when I went to put a rubber on and have sex with a very pretty young girl friend. When I went to insert my penis I went limp out of guilt and felt humiliated by it. Ever since then I felt inadequate sexually and would actually ejaculate when petting with other woman. Between feeling guilty and programming my mind with porn which warped my view of sex I never felt like I could ever have an adequate sexual relationship with a woman (wife). I went to sex therapist who taught me how to control my erections with a common technique. I also took that to the next level in petting with a girlfriend before I got married by allowing her to stroke my penis while holding back my orgasms until I wanted to let it go. I also did this with my wife in our courting days. For me its what had to be done or I would have not had the confidence needed to marry. By masturbating in the presense of the Lord I reprogrammed my thinking by replacing thoughts of carnal lust and images, with bodily sensations and pleasure. It replaced guilt (from porn) with innocence by appreciating another sense that the Lord gave us to enjoy. If I had not done this I would have went into the marriage with guilt and low confidence about sex. For some men here that is the least of their worries but not by me. I married in my thirties and it was the first time I   had had sexual intercourse. Other than always looking for Scripture look at the people God will put in your life to help you. These are HIS tools to help you. There are always exceptions to the rule.

Strong drink in the Lords eyes is wrong when abused. But look at these verses.  Proverbs 31:6-7

6 Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
 7 Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.

Not that what I did was sin but you get the picture?

It all depends what your goals are. For some marriage is not something that they want and that is fine. For them to not entertain their sexuality to become a self imposed Eunuch is fine if that is what they want. I am a very sexual being which God created to be such. Better to marry than to burn with lust.

 1 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.
 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.
 3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.
 5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
 6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.
 7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.
 8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I.
 9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. (burn with lust).

I did what was necessary and in my view appropriate to attain that goal. When we lust we sometimes think that is normal sexuality which it isn't. When I would come before the Lord praising Him for my sexuality minus the lust it would sometimes take awhile to become aroused but when I did it was very natural and beautiful. I have had explosive orgasms with this because the guilt (porn,lust) was absent and it was a natural act with no guilt (reprogramming). My confidence soared and it gave me the ability to search for a wife.

I think the problem with me is that OH! I can perform now when in the past I was afraid. Kind of like letting the genie out of the bottle and wanting new experiences. This is wrong and I now wish to rededicate myself to my wife. Christ cannot live through me with this sin in my life. Sin separates us from Him. He cannot permeate my very being unless I totally and fully nail this thing to the cross.

Lust is never satisfied. I don't care if its 2 women and you, bisexuality, beautiful escorts, porn or whatever you will never satisfy it. You always end up right back where you started again. You become more and more depraved seeking ever stronger highs, while ruining your relationship with God and everything else in your life.

 

 

Mark37
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 Posted: Sun Apr 1st, 2007 08:06 pm
Had a much better week this week. Less fantasy and NO porn for 3-4 weeks now. Still didn't divert my eyes as much as I should have and when I didn't I praised God for the womans beauty. The wife rcently had surgery preventing sex so I had a session with the Lord which I needed bringing my sexuality back to innocence again. No guilt and a smile on my face.:D 

Ever notice the look on a porn stars face? When in the act they frown with an almost painful look on their faces.:( Is this sexual joy? I don't think so.

Whoever is praying for me out there I appreciate it!;) Its working. What I do works for me with your prayers. Its just a matter of wanting to do whats right..

junkyardboy
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 Posted: Sun Apr 1st, 2007 10:23 pm
mark,

perhaps i am not getting this correctly.

here on this forum where literally hundreds of people bring their tears, despair, broken lifes and anguish, looking for healing and comfort and love before the throne  of grace their broken hearts in hand, you come before the most rightous God in the Holy of Holies with your penis in your hand.

what filth, what rubbish, what an abomination.

you have formulated this philosophy on a foundation of sexual immorality and have chosen to present this to the beloved children that God desires to make His own as a solution to their pain and anguish.

Job 38: 1-3
then the Lord answered Job out of the storm.
He said,
"who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge?
brace yourself like a man,
i will question you and you shall answer me!"

we are to reflect the glory and majesty of a living resurrected Christ thru our lives to a dying and hurting world.  the Christ you reflect should almost not be spoken of, it is so vile.

at least the faithfulness of God's word has been reflected by you.
"and He gave them over to a reprobate mind"  Romans 1:28

thank God for that.
peter



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truthseeker
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 Posted: Mon Apr 2nd, 2007 03:18 pm
Hello all,

I am locking this thread and bringing it to the attention of the administrators.  It has become way to explicit and contentious, and is diametrically opposed to the foundational principals that mike has shared in his articles, which need to be respected.  I am not necessarily saying that there is no room for differing views, but once expressed, they need not be repeated with more and more discord and explicitness.  That does not encourage or uplift, and does not serve the purpose of these forums.

TruthSeeker


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