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guitarist63
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Posted: Sat Nov 24th, 2007 02:25 pm |
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This is my new accountability thread.
Today is November 24th.
26 November. OK so far. I decided yesterday to say that I am not going to do this ever again and I did it for the last time Friday 23 November. I am not looking at the obstacles any more. Ending it, that's all.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 07:46 pm by guitarist63
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sam
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Posted: Tue Nov 27th, 2007 08:06 pm |
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| how about an update stephen?
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guitarist63
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Posted: Tue Nov 27th, 2007 09:58 pm |
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Thanks Sam.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 07:47 pm by guitarist63
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sam
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Posted: Wed Nov 28th, 2007 02:49 pm |
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i understand and wish you well my dear brother.
sam
Last edited on Wed Jan 9th, 2008 04:23 pm by sam
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guitarist63
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Posted: Wed Nov 28th, 2007 11:49 pm |
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Hi Sam,
Thanks. I thought that was what accountability was - confessing sins.
Last edited on Tue Jul 1st, 2008 08:53 pm by guitarist63
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Seeking God
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Posted: Thu Nov 29th, 2007 01:44 am |
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Dear Guitarist,
I thought that was what accountability was - confessing sins. In my opinion, accountability is a kind of friendship,
In my life, I've been blessed with an accountability which
gives me room for total honesty, encourages my further growth in God, warns me when the yellow lights blinks.
Anyhow,
How are you today?
Praying for you...
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guitarist63
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Posted: Thu Nov 29th, 2007 11:45 pm |
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Hello Seeking God. Thank you for your prayers. I also pray for you. I realize that having an accountability partner is a kind of friendship but accountability for me here is more confession.
I said I would stop on Saturday and so far I have. No episodes of it since Friday morning, 23 November. I have to decide to walk away from this and to ignore the obstacles or I will be forever trapped in it.
Last edited on Tue Jul 1st, 2008 08:54 pm by guitarist63
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sam
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Posted: Fri Nov 30th, 2007 02:12 pm |
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guitarist,
it's great to hear that you haven't acted out since last friday. i am praying for you.
sam
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guitarist63
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Posted: Fri Nov 30th, 2007 07:11 pm |
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Thanks Sam. I have prayed for you also. Sexual sin doesn't thrive when I'm busy helping others.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 07:51 pm by guitarist63
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guitarist63
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Posted: Mon Dec 3rd, 2007 08:13 pm |
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Here is the 10th day and I have done it again! There were obstacles but I said I wasn't going to pay attention to them.
This will probably displease a lot of the Christ followers here who have got free of this but I am not here to please you. I have displeased God and that's what matters. I should live to please Him and Him only.
Last edited on Tue Jul 1st, 2008 08:59 pm by guitarist63
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sam
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Posted: Mon Dec 3rd, 2007 08:28 pm |
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you are absolutely right, god's opinion is the only one that really matters. i'm sorry to hear of your succumbing to the temptation. i think you can conquer this because you said that you struggled with porn before and now you don't, that's a real big accomplishment. if you can overcome that, then why not m? remember that no matter what, god loves you.
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guitarist63
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Posted: Tue Dec 4th, 2007 06:21 pm |
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Very sick since Sunday and steadily worse. Have not succumbed.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 07:54 pm by guitarist63
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guitarist63
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Posted: Sat Dec 8th, 2007 03:57 pm |
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Failed today with m. I did say I would ignore obstacles. These include lack of sleep, tiredness, sickness.
Last edited on Tue Jul 1st, 2008 09:00 pm by guitarist63
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copinghubby
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Posted: Sun Dec 9th, 2007 02:54 pm |
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guitarist,
Have faith and work one day at a time. We have confidence that you can defeat the hells that are causing you to "m". Rely on the Lord and pray that he gives you the strength to overcome, for with Him, nothing is impossible.
Like you, I have given up porn and have recently started working on giving up "m" and lustful thoughts. I pray everyday (and often during the day) for the strength to take just one more step on my journey. Ultimately, I would like to be free forever, but can not envision having the strength for that. But if I can be free for just do one day, one step, then I can do another.
Hang in there and keep fighting. There are many here that are going through this and here to support you.
Peace!
Jeff
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guitarist63
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Posted: Sun Dec 9th, 2007 04:06 pm |
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Thanks, copinghubby for your comforting words and advice. As you say, more realistic to take each day at a time. Sickness per se is not a trigger on its own in my case. I say that because last night was the same as the night before for coughing fits and laying awake until 7.00 in the morning. So tiredness and sickness that follow an episode like yesterday's will not in themselves be triggers. They will only have an effect if other factors are added, namely the discomfort that comes from a period of abstinence. I don't describe myself as compulsive with it. If I were, I would not have any restraint at all. This isn't to exuse it.
A greater setback is that some old porn came into my memory again and I entertained it.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 08:00 pm by guitarist63
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copinghubby
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Posted: Sun Dec 9th, 2007 05:37 pm |
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guitarist,
Have courage and do not beat yourself up over a setback. Celebrate the days that you did not "m" and thank God for your strength on those days. Please try and focus on the positive.
I am trying my hardest to do the same and focus on the strength that the Lord provided me in finally realizing my addiction and being able to confess to my wife (knowing the damage it would cause).
Recognize that those fantasies are put into your mind by the hells. It is OK that they come into our minds, we can not control that. We can only control whether or not we entertain them. That is when we own them and they become our sin. Once again, today is a new day to start and pray for strength. I am praying for you to have the strength to make it through today. Tomorrow, we will pray again.
Peace!
Jeff
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guitarist63
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Posted: Sun Dec 9th, 2007 05:52 pm |
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Thanks copinghubby. You're right about keeping positive. It's the fact this thing hadn't happend for many months (images from past viewing of porn) that makes it hard to cope with.
You're right about these things coming by and it becomes sin when we entertain them. I did, so it was sin. Recognizing that I have done that enables me to pray about it and to avoid entertaining such images when they come back another time.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 08:02 pm by guitarist63
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Paulos
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Posted: Wed Dec 12th, 2007 03:21 am |
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Guitarist63,
Several of your more recent slips have been associated with lack of sleep. I too find that tiredness weakens my resolve to bear discomfort. But very glad to hear you made it again to the 10th day. Praying for you.
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guitarist63
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Posted: Wed Dec 12th, 2007 08:50 pm |
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Thanks Paulos
Trying not to count the days.
Last edited on Mon Jun 30th, 2008 08:05 pm by guitarist63
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copinghubby
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Posted: Thu Dec 13th, 2007 02:37 am |
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Paulos and guitar,
Like you, when I am tired the hells have a much easier time with me.
guitar,
Hoping you get better soon and can regain your strength. I find that it can be good not to count the days because we can get lax thinking we made it so many days, we can easily make it another. We need to try and be diligent each day!
~Peace!
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