| Author | Post |
|---|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: |    |
|
Posted: Fri May 30th, 2008 07:21 pm |
|
Hello Man, Paulos and others here
I reached 5 days and then I was sorely tempted to give in but didn't and prayed. Very soon after I was asleep and exhaustion was the reason for that. When I woke up there was no temptation to give in and it was a good day. Sixth day ended and then not such a good night last night. I succumbed about 3.00 a.m. and stuck in the cycle.
|
Guitarist_John
Member
|
Posted: Fri May 30th, 2008 10:07 pm |
|
Hello all. I really need to post more often.
Last Sunday, I unfortunately chased around fantasies in my mind, and on Monday I gave to indulgence, and acted out those fantasies with MB'ing. Whats worse, is that I actually knew some of the people I was fantasizing about...what a loathsome thing that is. In the days after, I felt as though I had actually crossed a certain line, and I actually felt the pangs of guilt in the days afterwards, which does not usually happen. Since then, by God's grace, I've been alright. Today I was tempted in my thoughts, but didnt give in, thankfully.
I'm not gonna let this keep me down. I'll just keep going. "We are more than overcomers through Him that saved us." We can overcome this! I feel a bit like a hypocrite now, since I saw what I had last posted. A thing I am thankfully about though, even though its a bit inconvenient, I havent had much of a chance to access the internet. And I guess I'm better off that way. Meanwhile, I've been reading Pilgrim's Progress, the complete and unabridged version, and I am very much enjoying it. I was surprised when it had lots of verses and allegorical situations that I could really relate to. It was a comfort. In fact, thats where I was reminded of the above verse.
I'd like to type more, but I must be off to sleep.
God bless all of you.
____________________
"In the world you will have trouble, but I leave you my peace that where I am there you may also be." - Jesus
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 12:14 am |
|
Thanks for keeping us in the picture, John. This thread logs the progress of pilgrims so very apt that you should be reading Pilgrim's Progress!
Got the tension again today but was so busy it dissipated and went.
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 02:11 am |
|
My body seems to be very sensitive to what I see, hear, register..
Another thing; Took a test in a 12-step group; Self-diagnosis.. and I didn't score very high if I answer direct on the questions: "Did you have mutliple partners?", but if I go to my things, what my heart is longing for, I might score high.
So the problem is that I think that I might not have a problem. It can be difficult to see it. How much d I have to destroy?
What is "normal"? What do "everybody" do? What is okay?
What is accepted? Maybe it is okay to lust a little bit?
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 02:11 am |
|
My body seems to be very sensitive to what I see, hear, register..
Another thing; Took a test in a 12-step group; Self-diagnosis.. and I didn't score very high if I answer direct on the questions: "Did you have mutliple partners?"for example, but if I go to my things, what my heart is longing for, I might score high.
So the problem is that I think that I might not have a problem. It can be difficult to see it. How much do I have to destroy?
What is "normal"? What do "everybody" do? What is okay?
What is accepted? Maybe it is okay to lust a little bit?
I am not saying it is, but such questions can come..
Last edited on Sun Jun 1st, 2008 02:13 am by Man
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
Seeking God
Member
| Joined: | Wed Aug 15th, 2007 |
| Location: | Jakarta, Indonesia |
| Posts: | 220 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 08:48 am |
|
Hi guys,
Sorry didn't post much nowadays. I have made my computer's filter to a higher level, which means only several "white list" websites I can surf now. As for my struggles, I'm extremely happy to say that I am 40 plus days free, and God is very kind in keeping me in him, it's not that I'm great, nope, I fall too, and miserably too often, but it was His word and promises that kept me pure from Mb and Porn.
Yesterday I was severly tempted, I happened to found my older brother's porn dvd, and I was so tempted to watch, but anyhows, God took over, He reminded me of several hard verses, and virtually MAKE me call my accountability partner to pray together. And PRAISE GOD, the temptation is gone...
Keep fighting Guys, Guitarist, John, Holdsworth, Wilderness, Mike, and all others here. I will keep you in my prayers, don't lose heart, be courageous, dwell in His Word and know that the LORD your God will take you to His Promise Land of Purity and Salvation.
Seeking God.
|
Guitarist_John
Member
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 01:54 pm |
|
Good morning all.
Last night, I had one of those lustful dreams, so when I woke up, I was tempted, and I began indulging in my thoughts, and I almost gave in to M when, by Gods grace, I heard a family member open and close the door quite loudly. Something about that just shook me out of that indulgent stupor.
Don't lose hope guys! This thing is overcomeable. Sometimes I need to remind myself that.
To Man: I can understand how your body and mind can feel sensitive to sexual things. Sometimes if I see a little too much leg on TV, my mind goes bonkers. Not even just that, but even people in form fitting clothes have tempted me.
Regarding your question, what do you mean about how much you have to destroy? What do you mean by, whats normal? Do you mean, how most other people react to lust? Well, as someone said earlier, guitarist63, we are sexual beings. And I think Paulos said you can acknowledge those feelings, but just dont feed them. I think one of the main reasons we give in when we are tempted, is simply because we still *want* to do it.
You can speak out in faith, stare at a rock, pray, try to fix your mind on something else, but if you dont make that decision to NOT give in, your gonna fall. I may not be conveying this very well, but do you all know what I mean? You know, your being tempted, your on the brink of giving in or resisting, and you have that urging to go ahead and give in, and your will wants to fulfill that urge, so you may linger in that moment of decision, playing around with the thought in your mind until you finally plummet.
It happens to me. I'm tempted one day, and I dont give in, but I dont competely resist it either. I play around with the thought, so basically I still want to do it. Thats what happend to me this morning. I was tempted by the memories of the dream I had last night, and I had the choice to say no and pray (which does help) or just linger. Lingering leads to falling. This has been the case with me. Does anybody else know what I'm talking about?
Oh, and to answer guitarist63's question from a week ago, well, instead of a Mosque we have a bunch of builders building a house right next door. I'm sleeping on a ground room, and it feels like they bang on my wall sometimes. They like to work really early too. Frankly, I havent had good sleep for quite a while. For some reason, I keep going to bed late. I noticed that if I fall asleep after 11:30, I feel awful in the morning, and/or wake up late, or worse, wake up early by the builders. That may be one of the things that triggers temptation, since, when I'm tired in the morning, I just lie there in bed, too lazy to get up, and my thoughts run around...
Unfortunately, there was no church meeting yesterday and I wasnt able to go today, but I'll be sure to read my Bible and Pilgrim's Progress.
I hope my rambling have made sense to somebody 
____________________
"In the world you will have trouble, but I leave you my peace that where I am there you may also be." - Jesus
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 08:34 pm |
|
Seeking God wrote: Hi guys,
Sorry didn't post much nowadays. I have made my computer's filter to a higher level, which means only several "white list" websites I can surf now. As for my struggles, I'm extremely happy to say that I am 40 plus days free, and God is very kind in keeping me in him, it's not that I'm great, nope, I fall too, and miserably too often, but it was His word and promises that kept me pure from Mb and Porn.
Yesterday I was severly tempted, I happened to found my older brother's porn dvd, and I was so tempted to watch, but anyhows, God took over, He reminded me of several hard verses, and virtually MAKE me call my accountability partner to pray together. And PRAISE GOD, the temptation is gone...
Keep fighting Guys, Guitarist, John, Holdsworth, Wilderness, Mike, and all others here. I will keep you in my prayers, don't lose heart, be courageous, dwell in His Word and know that the LORD your God will take you to His Promise Land of Purity and Salvation.
Seeking God.
Seeking God, can you explain a little bit what do you mean with that God took over? How did He take over? How did He virtually MAKE you call? Do you loose heart or not?
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 09:43 pm |
|
Hello GuitaristJohn. Good to see you posting again Seeking God. Glad to hear your good progress in the right direction and thanks for your encouragement. With Christ's help, I can achieve it. On my own, no chance.
I'm sorry to hear that one noise trouble has been replaced by another, possibly worse. Out of the frying pan into the fire.
You're coping very well with it, however. If I were in your shoes, I'd be going seriously round the bend and probably on some sort of medication. Have you tried industrial ear plugs. They can be ordered online. Better to try a trial pack of assorted ones first which is a) much cheaper and b) offers you a choice to see which plug will suit best.
I haven't yet tried any except those a friend gave me which were too tight. The most effective ones have to be around 37db and not the 22 db that you see on wax and other plugs bought over the counter at the chemist. Muffles earplugs from Boots are very good. Making them, however, out of the rolled up raw materials you get is an art that requires trial and error.
On this thread's topic am doing all right since my last confession. Have been very busy.
Last edited on Sun Jun 1st, 2008 09:47 pm by guitarist63
|
love&hate
Member
| Joined: | Mon Apr 9th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 60 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 11:08 pm |
|
Man wrote: Hi, thanks for feedback. I feel your post gave me something Love&hate. It was maybe that to bounce eyes and that we have a choice.
But what about feel the feelings? That sexual feelings come in body, but you also said something about fueling the lust... so maybe it is not so smart?
Thanks Paulos: Is this something that you know works?
Hey Man
I am not free yet and the following is just my opinion, i could be wrong.
I believe that thoughts, beliefs and desires are composed of energy. According to the second law of thermodynamics you cannot destroy engergy but rather just redirect it. For me personally i have spent alot of time and energy building up fantasies and hyping up attractions i have for certain female body parts. These existing fantasies are very active in my life as they contain alot of energy (i think about them alot fueling them with energy).
So when i see an attractive woman that is inappropriately dressed in my opinon and if my bouncing the eyes fails i start to look and i lust for her. I lust for her because my beliefs, thoughts and desires are all wired for this, i have active energized fantasies and obsessions about women and their body parts.
There is no way to destroy these desires to my knowledge. So what do i do? Well God tells me to submit to him and flee from the devil. I can pray for Him to create a new heart in me and renew my spirit. You see i also have desires for God and to please him. So the more i surrender to God and read his word and obey his teaching the more energy is drawn out of the bad thoughts, fantazies and directed into my beliefs and love for God and other people, in other words good things not evil.
So that is the battle for my life (not by body but my spirit, thoughts, desires etc) is over where i direct my thoughts, the more i think of Godly things and obey Him the more i crucify the old desires, but if i spend time thinking about my fantasies or sexy women then i just build up my evil desires. Some days i am 50-50. Both desires have a hold on me and i feel torn apart, like Dr Jeckyl and Mr Hyde. I believe that when we have "crucified" our flesh and become Spirit filled christians than these evil desires are almost completely (or completely) drained of energy and cannot actively impact our lives anymore. All of our energy is focused into glorifying God. Of course we remember what we have done, our memories are not erased but only the shells of the evil desires remains. They are only a shell as there is no enery left inside them.
Just my opinion
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 1st, 2008 11:53 pm |
|
Thanks
Formfitting clothes can be tempting. Just walking around in the city..
I think I have not experienced this so much before that my body react like this on outer stimuli: What I see, smell, hear..
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Mon Jun 2nd, 2008 12:33 am |
|
I It seems that my body reacts much more now than before.. It is enough to sit in the library beside an attractive woman
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Mon Jun 2nd, 2008 08:44 pm |
|
Hi Man,
In the library situation, do you ever decide to sit on your own? I always go for an empty table because I can't focus on my work if others are sitting at the same table. If they move, my side vision latches onto it and I can't think of what I am studying which requires my undivided attention.
There are plenty of ugly people in the world. Maybe you could choose to sit with someone who isn't pretty and wouldn't be a temptation? 
Being a sexual being serves no purpose for me. I might as well have been born without sexual characteristics because I am decided that I am not going to marry.
Last edited on Fri Jun 6th, 2008 11:24 pm by guitarist63
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Tue Jun 3rd, 2008 02:25 am |
|
Hi, feel that I don't get very much respect on job. It maybe could be a trigger if it is together with thousand other things..
I am talking about those who have known me very long. The customers might respect me.. They don't know me so well maybe..
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Fri Jun 6th, 2008 11:32 pm |
|
I have been out today and I feel that I am allways longing for something.. if a woman has a short shirt: What can I see?..
It seems to fill something..
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 8th, 2008 05:03 pm |
|
Hi Man,
Going out is for me a terrible string of temptations. In a big city with a lot of young and also attractive ladies, the temptation is to ogle but I have so far in the past year or so been able to turn the other way.
Last edited on Sun Jun 8th, 2008 05:04 pm by guitarist63
|
Man
Member
| Joined: | Sat Aug 19th, 2006 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 570 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 8th, 2008 07:19 pm |
|
| Thanks Guitarist for your feedback
____________________
May the Lord bless you all!
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Sun Jun 8th, 2008 09:49 pm |
|
Doing ok. Great day with worship and music.
Last edited on Mon Jun 9th, 2008 08:13 pm by guitarist63
|
guitarist63
Member
| Joined: | Mon Feb 12th, 2007 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 1011 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Wed Jun 11th, 2008 09:06 pm |
|
Finding it difficult today. Few days I can recall more difficult than this one. I've been busy all day. Slept fitfully last night. The weather is humid which doesn't help at night.
|
Is268
Member
| Joined: | Sat Nov 26th, 2005 |
| Location: | |
| Posts: | 20 |
| Status: |
Offline
|
| Mana: | |
|
Posted: Thu Jun 12th, 2008 09:18 am |
|
I seem to only come here when I am really at the pits.
Been struggling a lot with porn and masturbation lately.
I need prayer:
- that I will fight against it
- that I will find nourishment in Christ
- that I'll find an accountability partner
|
|
|
|
|
RSS