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Quentin
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Posted: Sat Nov 26th, 2005 04:05 am |
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holdsworth, you did stop, and you stopped before things could have gotten worse...where you may have started to lose a battle....you stepped up and won in the end.
From what I read about temptations, and what I know about this specific temptation I know that it takes many battles to make it smaller, and it helps incredibly when you dont even have the means of doing it. When Im not anywhere near my computer.....Im never even remotely tempted......no matter how I feel.
But its awesome to hear that you stopped things before it got too far!
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holdsworth
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Posted: Sat Nov 26th, 2005 07:53 am |
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| Thank youI just hate it when I can let the seed of lust set in my mind and there is the availibility to act upon those impulses. In England there are motorway signs saying 'Tiredness kills', also too much isolation.It is especially at these times, and when I have not been wise that temptation has a real chance of turning into sin. I can go and act and seek out those things that bring emptiness, I still get seduced by the beauty of the images (that lodge in my mind)and it is only from experience that I am reminded that fulfilling the sexual desires upon these images brings emptiness and the next image or video of a woman never satisfies....I am struggling to really getting into the word at the moment but I know that if Jesus came and died on the cross and rose again for us..then his word is the source of peace, wisdom, life, and joy. Porn doesn't provide any of those things..just a quick fix till the next quick empty fix. I need to remember this.
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captivated
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Posted: Sat Nov 26th, 2005 09:17 am |
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All that you guys are saying is so good....so, so real!  I really appreciate the sincerity and realness I hear over and over here! We all want freedom or we wouldn't be here......we want Jesus! Sometimes it's seemed the biggest lie of the enemy we believe is that we're alone or that we're beyond God's ability to help (condemned) or that we just have to try harder with brute determination alone. Well, I was also thinking about how God's word is the sword of the Spirit and how we're to pick it up and use it to fight, like you all were saying.....AND how we're not alone in this....how the very Spirit of the ever-living God dwells inside of us through the blood of the risen Lamb! So, we're not only NOT condemned (Romans 8), but we have hope and we have power because He wants us free and gives us what we need to get there out of His great love as our perfect Father! ".....Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord Almighty." Zechariah 4:6 See also Romans 8 and 2 Corinthians 2:5- 6:2 for more about how there's no condemnation for those in Christ and the power of the Spirit through Christ in us to change us from glory to glory! We are not alone! Praying for continued healthy connections for us all and for increasing degrees of the freedom we have in Christ to be experienced!
Thanks for being real, you guys! Keep going!
captivated
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Is268
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Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2005 12:44 am |
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Hi!
Just signed up on this forum today, so I will share where I am at.
I am a 17 year old guy from NSW, Australia and have grown up in the church all of my life. I have always been active in my church and church-school community. Slowly over the last 18 months I have found my self falling in to the path of porn addiction. Starting out just looking at pictures of celebrities, I found myself searching for topless pictures and the like. Soon I discovered the trap of TGPs and found myself looking every week. Recently it has turned to an almost daily struggle and have also found myself in the trap of masturbation.
I have decided that this destructive path must stop if I am to have fruitful relationships in the future. I am in need of someone to keep me accountable - if you can, please PM me.
Please help me in my struggle and thank you in advance for that.
Yours sincerely,
Is268
Last edited on Sun Nov 5th, 2006 08:16 am by Is268
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Carli
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Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2005 05:04 pm |
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Hi
I'm a female-I hope it's not a problem, but I have found what youy've all said a big help...thank you!
I struggle with all issues regarding lust, sex, promiscuity, and very recently I've discovered that I am drawn towards pornography. I lived for many years thinking it was ok to have foreplay with a partner, which inevitably went too far more than once. I felt so lost for such a long time that I kept falling into the same trap, over and over again, looking for comfort in physical relationships rather than truly looking to God.
A big factor coming between God and me was (is) my guilt I think...I still struggle with guilt now and just want to get over this barrier so I can rebuild my relationship with God and make sure I don't slip up again!
I'm afraid that my promiscuity has ruined my relationship with God for good...it feels like I'm the worst Christian ever. I have some amazing Christian mates, but it's so hard to speak to them. Please could you pray for me, thanks you guysxLast edited on Sun Nov 27th, 2005 05:05 pm by Carli
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captivated
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Posted: Sun Nov 27th, 2005 06:15 pm |
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Adothetechy and Carli,
Just wanted to welcome you both to the forums! No time to reply at length now, but I have prayed and will pray for both of you! If I could say one thing right now though it would be, "Don't listen to the enemy!" You ARE valuable and dearly loved through the shed blood of Christ AND you are never beyond His ability or desire to rescue and keep you close! Remember, God is greater and more powerful and has won the battle for us in Christ's death and resurrection victory. Now we're all learning what it means to walk in His victory by the power of the Holy Spirit and encouragement of the body of believers here on these forums! God is for us, so who can be against us? Ask Him to continue to lead you both in providing others to connect with locally in a healthy manner and ask Him to show you which books He wants you to read, to lead you by His Spirit, to bring the Bible to life for you....to show you how He wants to provide for the needs of your hearts because it's not just the outward obedience of not masturbating or never thinking a lustful thought He wants, but He desires so much more which will bless and nurture us and HAS so much more FOR us in His embrace which we could never find in the embrace of another "lover"!!! He wants to take our pain and sin and woundedness and turn it into something beautiful that shines and satisfies fully and is able to love others with pure devotion. Trust that He'll provide all you need in each situation to fight and win this battle more and more and don't let the enemy fool you into believing you are permanently condemned! Romans 8 Keep pressing....keep running the race for the prize and believe that the God of the universe is running it with and for you.....to capture ALL of your hearts!!! You are both on the right track connecting here.....you are both cared for and safe here..... and held in prayer for your freedom and sexual healing! Keep in touch and keep reading the mounds of wisdom and advice previously given on this web site's articles and forums. It will bless you!
With care
captivated
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holdsworth
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Posted: Mon Nov 28th, 2005 10:31 am |
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| Hi I think honesty and openness is key and remembering that you are definately not alone in this struggle for a pure heart and mind. Today I have been tempted in my mind, to seek out videos and images that I know that my eyes would like to gaze upon, yesterday was even worse. Because I am taking steps to avoid this sin the temptations can sometimes seem unbearable and the only option might be to satisfy my lust. This is a total lie......my flesh cries out to be satisfied as if life depended on it, the truth is that life depends on not satisfying these desires that aren't good for me.please pray for me that I may know more of Jesus in these times of temptation and I may know the strength from him to remain in the truth and light, and that I can know his peace and freedom.
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isolated
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Posted: Tue Nov 29th, 2005 05:51 pm |
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| hey holdsworth don't be isolated its not good and as far as the computer gos this may help you and others and it is somthing we try to put out of our mind I don't think all of these girls are willing that you see on the computer and the is very sad indeed think about that and you my stop ,we can not just please ourselfs ,we have to look at the big picture and it is not nice . you are in my prayers
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holdsworth
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Posted: Wed Nov 30th, 2005 07:09 am |
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| Thanks..I know this in my heart. I also know that I said no to lust and seeking out yesterday because of what Jesus did for me on the cross.....I am thankful that in my weakness he showed me his love and grace and truth.
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captivated
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Posted: Wed Nov 30th, 2005 08:24 am |
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Praise God! You guys are really an inspiration! He is working in you! Praying, too!
captivated
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matt
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Posted: Wed Nov 30th, 2005 01:41 pm |
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I've read through and posted in some of the other forums, but never in this one, I don't know why. Anyway, I have no way around using a computer, as I use one for work, so I'm trying to train myself to use it for healthy, healing choices rather than isolationist, destructive ones. So, here I am, choosing to get real with the world. I'm one week and 2days sober from my last acting out. The struggle seems to be lessing, but that maybe because I've adjusted my approach in dealing with the temptation the minute it enters my mind. The temptations continue to bombard the door to my mind, but so far the outer-defenses have held. One of the things I noticed about a week ago was that my boundaries were still in place but they had been moved in so close to me that it was near impossible for me to not cross them. I've tried to re-strengthen some of my outer boundaries, such as not going to what I call "transition" websites. These are sites that are not classified as pornographic or even falling for me, but they are sites such as news sites, football sites or other sites that begin to tease me with the ideas of lust. In the past, I had been allowing myself to argue that there was nothing inherently wrong with these sites, which there's not, but they almost always led me to desire more, and would lead me to lusting and eventually masturbation.
I'm going to try to remain accountable here on a more consistent basis. Thanks for listening
matt
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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Carli
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Posted: Wed Nov 30th, 2005 02:19 pm |
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Hey all you guys, a big thanks for your prayers, and what you've shared here. I'm actually getting home from work excited to see if there are any new posts here...
I know that God's grace is sufficient for me, and all of you have really helped that sink in, and taken away a lot of the crappy guilt I was feeling.
If any of you are struggling with the same issues of guilt, then please don't isolate yourselves, that's what the enemy wants, please turn straight to God who loves us with an uncomprehendable grace!
mwax
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Is268
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 06:49 am |
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whoa, it has been 5 days since I started fighting my addiction. so far i have not completely stumbled, but it is one huge battle. i nearly fell about 15 minutes ago, I was in the process of heading to look at those images again, but stopped myeslf just as they started loading. the desire to masturbate is sometimes so overwhelming and I nearly do. Pray that I will not fall.
Thanks guys,
Is268
Last edited on Sun Nov 5th, 2006 08:18 am by Is268
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captivated
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 07:13 am |
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Prayed!
captivated
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Is268
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 07:30 am |
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thanks mate, means alot
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holdsworth
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 08:46 am |
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| Hey there.know exactly what that feels like!!....keep fighting it, and praying and being honest and accountable. The temptations come when you least expect them!. it is easy to get caught out and deceived. We all need to learn to watch out for the triggers that set us off.Sometimes it seems unbearable, sometimes part of us so wants to fulfill the desires we know to be wrong. I couldn't sleep last night and I was thinking about was Jesus up on that cross, alone and in agony......and for what.....for setting each and every one of us free from these things that bind us. He knows. he understands. All things are possible for those that are in him.the next few days might be really hard, but keep going.
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matt
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 10:26 am |
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Great wisdom! A huge turning point for me was when I stopped viewing Jesus as a slave master and started viewing him as a caring guide. He's not interested in whipping us into shape, he wants us to follow his teachings, not due to pride or arrogance, but because they are what he knows works best in this life. I've learned that the Bible is not a rule book, but more like a life guide. It wasn't created so that we would be limited, but so that we could avoid the pitfalls and bad choices that others have made before us.
Ok, enough preaching, and time to get "real". Today is day 11 of my newest sobriety. I found myself waking this morning with a load of guilt, but I'm not sure what it was from. I also had an overwhelming feeling of vulnerability, so I know that I need to stay connected and remain in his grace throughout the day. Please pray to that end and feel free to question me about this in the interest of accountability.
A healthy day to all,
matt
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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captivated
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 10:51 am |
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You guys are such a blessing for me as a wife to see you all being vulnerable and open and real with one another! Thank you! Praying for all. When you talk of vulnerability being a potential trigger as a feeling, is this fear or something else? I know that part of getting sober is that there will be a bombardment of dealing with some uncomfortable feelings which the porn was used to "medicate"......I'm just trying to understand for my prayers for you guys and also for my husband. Thanks, again.
captivated
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matt
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 01:02 pm |
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Hi Captivate,
Its also a very big blessing to me to see a wife such as yourself trying to better understand this addiction in order to better pray for your husband. Please don't stop asking questions.
The vulnerability feeling that I was talking about was more being vulnerable to my flesh. It seems there are days when I wake up and no matter what temptation came my way, I would stand firm and not give in. There are other days, such as today, when I don't feel as strong and feel more vulnerable to the attacks. Most days fall in between these two extremes. Vulnerable days, like today, doesn't have to mean I'll act out (although it has many times), it just means that I have to be much more intentional in staying focused and preparing myself for the potential attacks that may come. I need to understand better my triggers and strengthen the boundaries that I've put in place.
I hope this helps, again, feel free to ask questions, I would love to answer them,
matt
____________________
In faith there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don't.
-Blaise Pascal
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captivated
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Posted: Thu Dec 1st, 2005 01:57 pm |
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Thanks for the reply, Matt. This was helpful! If I have anything else to ask, I'll remember your offer. Thanks. Hey, I know I've said this before on here, but one thing that assists us in rising above is worship....and having worship type music on in the background can help us enter in when we're struggling to do so on our own.
captivated
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