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Quentin
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Posted: Sat Nov 19th, 2005 02:22 am |
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Right now she hasnt opened up to anyone. I'm praying that she will if it is his will. But she is realizing that she cant just bury it. Praise God for that. Shes very wonderful. Shes very head strong too....which makes this even more tough for her.
I'm learning to be patient as God works in this situation. So ive laid off the mass attack of apologies and what not for now. I thank you so much for praying for her. Please never stop....ide never ask that for myself....but I so eagerly wait for her to be healed.
Another day gone by...the Lord Jesus Christ keeps me far from temptation! I am thankful for his strength. This sunday I start going to a Celebrate Recovery group I think...I hope that goes well.
- David
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captivated
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Posted: Sat Nov 19th, 2005 09:36 am |
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That's great you're attending a group, David! Is that a faith-based group? Just wondering because I'm not familiar with it by name?
It is good you are being patient with your friend. This sort of pain does take time and grief is a process, as with any wound.....and there are no guarantees how they'll respond. So, if she seems angry at one moment, then okay...then weeping....then angry again, do not be surprised. Sometimes we think the stages of grief will fit into neat little compartments....denial, anger, sadness/grief, acceptance.....but we often go back and forth among these. Our view of the one we love has died and what we "thought" that relationship was to us has died along with it. God can use this pain to draw us closer to Him.....to cause us to realize there's a part of all of us which porn can't fill.....another person can't fill....ONLY He can fill.....AND that He does fill and transform us so wonderfully when we draw near to Him! As believers in Jesus, we know this theoretically, but sometimes don't live like it. Pain like this can grow us stronger and draw us in intimacy to experience the embrace of the One who has and does love us so if we let it.....it is a process though. 
Yes, as we interact on these forums and I see your name, I will pray for her....and as God brings you to mind, as well. Does she ever read her Bible? The Psalms were a great source of comfort for me as I went through this. I also read a book called "Miracles Happen When Women Pray" and "Wild at Heart" around that time, but different people need different things. God will give her what she needs as she seeks Him. Keep seeking His face yourself to have His heart for this life and for others and He will show you what you need, as well! His Word is alive and powerful!!! ...HE is alive and powerful and able to do immeasurably more than all we can ask or imagine!
Prayerfully,
captivated
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Quentin
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Posted: Sat Nov 19th, 2005 01:23 pm |
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Yes it is a Faith Based group. I feel embarassed to go, but I thought ager at what pornography has dont to my life was enough to stop me the last time.
I posted on the introduction thing on here more if what God has showed me in my past. Satan had quite a bit on his agenda when he wanted me to fall.
My now ex-girlfriend, she sends me journal pages every day, or twice a day. It all starts on November 11th....that was my bday. Shes only sent me up to November 12th. It just got to the first of the bad. When I first lied about something very dumb.
Im learning a lot. #1 How much she has truely loved, and adored me. #2 How deeply she is hurt.
She has always loved praying with me, reading with me, and she does those things for sure in her free time. I think right now she is having some dealings with God.....a lot of "whys" to work out.
She has wild at heart as well...I first got that in January I think.....I love that book....and in not too long I bought it for her and had her read it too.
I cannot thank you enough for how much you've put into this Captivated....I greatly appreciate your encouragement, explanations, and the greatest....your prayers. The Bible talks about how theres strength in numbers, and how if 2 or more come together in his name.....it shall be so. So.....Thank you so very much.
- David
This was after all her first relationship....and it took a great deal of opening up, and veing vulnerable to make her do this.
- David
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captivated
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Posted: Sat Nov 19th, 2005 09:34 pm |
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It sounds like you, personally, are on the right track, David. Yes, there is strength in numbers.......and especially men with other men when it comes to the topic of sexual addiction, so I pray this group will be a great blessing to you in this respect. Hopefully you'll find some blessed fellowship and prayer warriors there, as well! Your friend does have to take responsibility for her own recovery, regardless of whether or not you ever pursue marriage together as a couple.....this is still a wound which will take time to heal, as we've discussed.... I would also really like to see her join a group of women working towards healing and seeking God together in this area.....praying with and for one another, etc.....or possible some individual counsel if she still has past issues to work through on top of this one. God's been so good to provide people to pray for and support me, by the way.....it is an honor and a privilege to support others as well, as God's given me a heart to do so! He's so amazing!!! He's here to save.....to heal.....to love us in the most amazing and radical ways!
captiveted
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ShadowWolf
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Posted: Sun Nov 20th, 2005 07:19 pm |
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Hello.
I haven't posted on the accountability thread in a few days so I will sum up the last few days.
I have been thinking lustful thoughts of porn and have been tempted to go look at it, even now I am being tempted, so I really need your prayers. I have also been tempted to use my new pda to download porn on, so I need you to pray I have strength in that area too. The effectual, fervant prayer of the righteous availeth much; so please pray for me brothers and sisters. I will keep you in my prayers too.
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captivated
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Posted: Sun Nov 20th, 2005 07:58 pm |
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Prayed/praying, brother!!!!!
captivated
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ShadowWolf
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Posted: Sun Nov 20th, 2005 11:26 pm |
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Hello.
Thank you for praying for me, it got me through my hour of temptation. Keep me continually in your prayers as I struggle with this problem. Thank you again.
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Steve
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Posted: Mon Nov 21st, 2005 02:29 am |
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Yikes! There are 69 replies in this thread. (Make it 70 with mine!)
I think that's a record! 
-Steve
(I usually stay busy in the "Introductions" and "Other Topics" sections.)
____________________
"Isolation is bad for any man, but for the sexual addict it is fatal." -Russell Willingham
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deaconJones
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Posted: Tue Nov 22nd, 2005 12:43 am |
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Yeah this is the thread I'm in the most because I feel a little bit of comfort knowing there are brothers and sisters out there struggling with this monkey on their back just like me. It's funny how I can be on this pc at night and my fingers start to type those addresses of places I know I shouldn't be. This time thank God I used my bookmark and marched straight on in here. I was fortunate on this round but I know that devil is still out there waiting to tempt me tomorrow. I hope to continue to be accountablie to you all in my daily WAR. Keep the prayers rolling for me and I will do the same.
____________________
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me!
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holdsworth
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 10:56 am |
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| Hijust made my introduction in the introduction page.....I fell today. My brother will call me this week and ask how I have been doing... I thought I would at least be able to go 1 week, but Oh no...I start to fight..I pray...then Temptation...then discouragement...then I act ...then I fall. I am ashamed and disheartened. Please pray that I might see this walk through into daylight...I've had this problem with soft porn for years and I know during very difficult teenage years it became my comfort. I am sickened by this now.
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RTK
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 12:07 pm |
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Holdsworth,
You're not alone. Read through the forum. There are lots of resources and advice that has been given to guys that are where you are.
RTK
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captivated
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 01:01 pm |
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Yes, lots.....and to some women, as well. One thing I don't think has been mentioned before is the practice of fasting for praying and spiritual breakthrough. Since the lust is really just a symptom of what we're doing to try to fill those deeper longings and wounds, fasting can be an opportunity to be still and know.....to open ourselves to be humbled physically and seek God. We also have to be purposeful to be in the Word, listen to worship type music, etc.....and for someone like me who's an auditory learner, having the Bible on CD has been helpful, even putting it on at bed time and falling asleep with the Word or worship music on can allow it to get into our spirits even if we aren't cognitively aware of it. Some of you may think I'm way out in left field here....just try it. Feeding God's word into our spirits....and having music on which lifts our hearts to praise and thank Him is a wonderful way to 1) make the enemy flee and 2) enable us to rise above our circumstances or boredom, driving us towards the lust in the first place. Anyway, some have tried this practice on a regular basis and found increasing degrees of freedom from porn as they have. They found that first they may have gone a week, then a month, then longer and longer. One man got really discouraged when he fell after a year, but his pastor reminded him how much longer and longer between......and how much freer he'd become....not that I'm saying slip-ups are the rule....I'm not debating that, just suggesting something God's provided to help us get free and increase our ability to know a deeper level of intimacy with Him which will truly satisfy us. There are many books available for this purpose. One is "Fasting For Spiritual Breakthrough" by Elmer Towns. I have also really liked "The Power of Prayer and Fasting: 10 Secrets of Spiritual Strength" by Ronnie Floyd. ....and if for medical reasons, you are unable to fast, there are still ways of doing this, like when I was pregnant and eating bland oatmeal all day was an option or whatever. God is not a pharisee and looks at our hearts, thankfully! His ways are so far above our understanding! Isaiah 55 Let us know if any of you try this and what God shows you.
captivated
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holdsworth
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Posted: Wed Nov 23rd, 2005 04:13 pm |
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| thanks for repliesI am not giving up seeking purity and know that God has not given up on me. It is good to know that I am not alone with this. Thanks.
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holdsworth
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Posted: Thu Nov 24th, 2005 08:13 am |
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| ALready seen something today that has got me racing. I'm reading every mans battle and I am at the stage of trying to starve my eyes of anything sensual that will feed my lust...it is really difficult in a society in which the media etc uses images. I walked away from the fantasies that were starting to lodge in my mind.....It is soooooo easy to be able to see an image of an attractive woman unclothed....and I am trying to make the right decisions to keep myself from seeing this stuff. Today I faced a simple trigger and I had to walk away from it although my flesh was saying otherwise.
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captivated
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Posted: Thu Nov 24th, 2005 04:11 pm |
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holdsworth,
You are doing great! You did walk away, contrary to what your flesh was saying! You are walking the narrow path and staying connected as well! Wonderful! A blessed Thanksgiving to you! Keep reading and staying connected, as you have been doing!
Prayerfully,
captivated
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holdsworth
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Posted: Thu Nov 24th, 2005 04:21 pm |
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| Thank you for encouragement. Some of the sensual images and videos I have seen have had such a strong hold on my mind that the power of them are quite frightening. At the moment it is every morning I wake with an image of a woman I have found attractive and this is really difficult to fight. I am keeping a prayer journal and have just ordered a book called 'breaking free' as I am on second reading of 'every mans battle'.I get really anxious and fearful at one weeks freedom, as I think that My habit has blocked some painful things that I don't like to face. Like being vunerable and rejection etc, etc.
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captivated
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Posted: Thu Nov 24th, 2005 04:42 pm |
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It is worth it to press through this!!!! .....so worth it!!!! Even though the enemy will tell you otherwise! Thank you for your honesty here! Sounds like a good book!
One thing I think we sometimes believe as christians is that we just have to try harder, but keep pressing, my friend! God is able to diminish and even remove those images! It's like a drug addict going through the shakes of withdrawal for a time, though, but it is good......keep going....read, pray, connect, exercise, call a friend, exercise harder, etc.... Whatever it takes! God will carry you through this! You can depend on Him!
continuing in prayer,
captivated
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holdsworth
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Posted: Fri Nov 25th, 2005 01:27 pm |
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| tempted again..dwelled on thoughts/images for a while, and then walked away as I knew it wasn't right. Even found myself at computer starting to search. Almost got pulled right in....the next 48hours will be hard.
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RTK
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Posted: Fri Nov 25th, 2005 06:02 pm |
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Go down to the Y and work out. Steve and I would suggest that you go for a bike ride...Go and volunteer your time, find a wholesome book...and keep going. You are not alone. One day at a time. Let Him lead you.
RTK
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holdsworth
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Posted: Fri Nov 25th, 2005 06:28 pm |
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| I came here to be honest and accountable.....I messed up. I was following through I was crying out to God and saying sorry and stopped right at last minute again!!!!!!!!!! I really don't want this.....its just insane that something can have this much hold.
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